standin still. forever lost.

*cries for help*

i hate being a retainee. i HATE it. u hear?!
i miss my exclassmates, #137,
i miss my friends,
and i miss the lessons i SHOULD be havin this year had i took art instead of
F***in economics!!!

i hate my retainee life.
the nxt time u see me juz slap me.
or take out a knife and Stab me.
just get me.
i'll thank thee.
and perhaps celebrate it with tea.

am i stabbed? *hopeful

calvin is goin away. *sobs
ok, i shan't be clingy. ew. haha
but god i'll miss him... he's my pillar! where would that pillar be if i wanted to feel feminnine? haha. oh i do love him so. i'll miss him lots.*sniff.

goodness. such depressin thoughts. don't be surprised if i go into depression. THAT would be a scary thought don't u think, considering how slappable my face already is? haha.
the gym and runnin will be the only temp way to get rid of my depressin thoughts.

and great. my mum juz brought me even bigger news to make my life MORE miserable than it already is.
wad could be more worst than workin, AFTER SCHOOL. will some one just god damn SAVE ME??? *cries harder.
i hate this feelin. i HATE it.

and i miss calvin so much.
and he's not even gone yet. *laughs
but in juz 3 days...

oh sigh